Today I read an article about Post-Wedding Stress Disorder. Yes, you read that right. It’s like PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) and can leave someone feeling seriously depressed when the wedding is over.

I’m not here to judge anyone but all I can say is that is definitely NOT me. I had an amazing time at the wedding but boy, am I glad it is over! I am ready for the next steps in life and wedding planning was very stressful.

I planned the wedding myself (and I was completely okay with that and preferred it). I’ll admit it,  I’m a control freak. So when it came time to leave for the honeymoon, I was so excited to throw out all the binders, magazines, receipts, you name it.

I am so glad I did it on my own and recommend it to others to save money. I did learn some things from wedding planning though that I want to pass onto future bride-to-bes who are planning themselves and looking for various tips about planning.

Lesson #1

  • If people are offering to help, use them! I personally didn’t until the very end but probably would’ve been a lot less stressed had I just let go a little. I wanted to do it all. I had 1,005,124 pins on my boards to complete and intended on doing every one of them… but I got burnt out fast! This is still supposed to be a fun time in your life so pass on tasks to others that want to help!

Lesson #2

  • Research research research! I thought I was going to save money by buying an invitation suite template on Etsy and printing myself. I was wrong! Paper is ridiculously expensive and then to pay for the printing and designing yourself.. figuring out sizing and then envelopes. I would’ve been better off buying a printed suite! It was the same for other various things – I thought a dessert table would be cheaper than a cake. You then have to factor in how many items of each to get, how many will people eat, how many stands to get. Every little thing adds up!

Lesson #3

  • On that same note, research your vendors! I lucked out and got awesome vendors with amazing prices… all except my venue. I went with the “prettiest” venue that wasn’t even built yet, thus had no reviews. Don’t do that!! Read your venue rules very carefully, especially what is included. Are chairs (indoor and out), tables, an arch, food, alcohol, the bar (that’s right, the movable bar wasn’t included at my venue), any extra decor like lights (that also wasn’t included… see what I mean?), day of coordinator, the day of hours. There are so many resources online for questions to ask your venue. You may feel like a bother but ASK THEM!

Lesson #4

  • Not everything needs to be new! The decorations are going to be used for a few hours. Buy them used! Borrow from a friend! I bought most of my decorations from local wedding groups on Facebook and turned right around and have already sold 75% of it.

Lesson #5

  • Don’t be your own day of coordinator. That was my plan! You really don’t need a day of coordinator if you have a great DJ. Mine kept us on track, had a timeline for all the other vendors which helped greatly! Your vendors are there to make the day run smoothly and they will do so if you let them!

Lesson #6

  • When budgeting, get the videographer! I was on the edge about this but I’m soooo happy I did this. I’ve only been married 5 weeks and can’t tell you how many times I’ve watched the video already. You see the little things from behind the scenes like each other getting ready, standing at the aisle, and things you forgot about! I am so happy we have the video to treasure for years to come.

Lesson #7

  • Once you set your budget, stick with it! If you need a spreadsheet – I have one I can send you that you can alter to your amounts! In the beginning I was so good and kept track of literally everything I bought but got burnt out the last couple of months. I tried to make sure I was at or under budget for every category and if I went over I would take money off another category!

Lesson #8

  • Make your RSVP respond by date about a month before the wedding. I thought that I just needed them back for the caterer numbers (which was due 2 weeks before) so I asked for the responses to be back 2.5 weeks beforehand. We had 80, yes, 80! people that I had to track down about RSVPs. I also had to do the seating chart last minute because of this. Give yourself time!

Lesson #9

  • You’ll save money with a smaller wedding party. Less flowers. Less presents. Less people to please. I had 3 girls by my side and felt like that was the perfect number!

Lesson #10

  • Something will go wrong. Every day of your life isn’t perfect so don’t expect your wedding day to EXACTLY as planned. It’s probably something very minor so don’t freak out if you get wind of it! It will be taken care of by showtime! Except ours… Ryan’s eye was red and puffy and crusty LOL. That was still there throughout pictures. Through good times and bad, right?

Are you engaged? Do you have any questions for me? Are you married and have any other lessons to share?


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  1. I thought of another way to save a few $$$–ask vendors if they will offer a discount in exchange for advertising! For example, lay out a few of the baker’s business cards on the cake table, maybe some printed balloons with the DJ’s logo tied to the Dj booth, that sort of thing. You never know! p.s. your pics are beautiful, congratulations!

  2. Great tips here! I so wish I would have paid for a videographer at my wedding! I did not to save money and I really regret it! Ypu are right I had an amazing DJ and it felt like I had two day of coordinators! I do wish I had researched a bit more about the cake decorators though! Research is so important. Thanks for sharing!

  3. great advice! two of my daughters friends (who also happen to be fleshly sisters) just recently got married, one just had her first anniversary while the other is barely hitting the 6 month mark of wedded bliss. Both weddings were handled by family and friends and they were both wonderful!! One was indoors while the latter one was an outdoor wedding in a rustic country barn setting. I thought it was crazy when I first heard where it was going to be but was pleasantly surprised at the beauty of it all!!! they were memorable and unforgettable. i know my girls will one day marry and i am so looking forward (i think lol) to helping get their special dates planned.

    You look beautiful btw, and these photos are gorgeous! esp the cupcake stand 😉

  4. These are great lessons. I had a courthouse wedding, so I never experienced wedding planning but from everything I head about the different costs and stresses, these seem like great lessons that a lot of my friends should know about. Congratulations on your marriage! I hope you both have a wonderful and blessed life 🙂

    Kylie <3 | http://livingwhimsicaldreams.blogspot.kr/

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